Sunday, August 18, 2013

Enduring

*The following story is told in first person for dramatic effect ONLY. Any resemblance to people or events living or dead is purely coincidental*

I am very close to someone. I care about them more than anything and do what I can to serve them in sacrificial love. Not necessarily a spouse, but certainly a very close and dear friend. I confide in this person and they confide in me. 

And then, one day, I learn that the trust we shared has been broken. This person has been taking my  information and using it behind my back to mock me or to damage my reputation. 

What am I going to do about it?! This is totally uncalled for, I have done everything for this person! I've served them and they turn around and stick a knife in my back! This is not fair! I shouldn't have to put up with this!

*Deep Breath* Well, maybe this was a one time sin.... Yeah, that's it. I can forgive and forget! Life returns to its placid state. 

And it happens again! 

Let us say, for the sake of shortening our words, that this cycle happens many times over several years until....

I just don't care anymore. I don't want to love that person anymore. 

All right, story time is over. I think, in all honesty, this has happened to a lot of us. We've been betrayed by someone we love. How are you supposed to respond to this? Even when the offense has only happened once, not multiple times, how are we supposed to respond? To be completely honest, I am dealing with something like this right now, as well as watching a conflict like this develop and simmer for several months (years, really). How are we all to respond as Christians? 

Someone whom I greatly trust gave this advice: apply 1 Corinthians 13. Isn't it great when God gives us very specific instructions on how to act?

Yeah, well I want to see anyone who can completely apply that passage! "Believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things"... Love is really hard!  Love is not "when I feel like it" or "when they are always acting in a loving manner towards me" Did you know that we are supposed to even supposed to treat people this way when they are our enemies?! (Matthew 5:43-44

So, the Bible really is pretty intense on this issue of what true love is. Let's just look at 1 Corinthians 13 in parts:

Charity (Love)...
  • Suffereth Long - that means to suffer for a long time (i. e. you don't have a "last straw")
  • Is Kind - We went over this in Sunday School today. Kindness is doing something for someone because you care about, whether you want to do it or not
  • Envieth Not - You are not jealous of what the other person has that you don't (be it possessions, popularity, or personality)
  • Vaunteth Not Itself - Basically it means that your goal is not to be lifted up or promoted by the object of your love. Your goal is actually to lift the other person up.
  • Is Not Puffed Up - Don't be proud in a self-glorifying manner. (See the whole book of proverbs)
  • Doth Not Behave Itself Unseemly - It knows where the boundaries are and stays well within them
  • Seeketh Not Her Own - Look out for the other person, let God worry about Who is taking care of you
  • Is Not Easily Provoked - Don't let your buttons get pushed (see "suffereth long")
  • Thinketh No Evil - This is a hard one: don't assume that the person who is doing you wrong is actually being malicious. This is a really hard one. Personally, I love to talk issues out - to think out loud. Sometimes I want to have someone with a listening ear. That may be all that the issue is about. True, the other person may be lacking discernment as to who they are confiding in, but we are talking about your response, not their actions.
  • Rejoiceth Not In Iniquity, But Rejoiceth In Truth - Don't silently gloat when the other person is falling on their face in sin! Just because you have an issue with them does not mean that the more they stumble the better because that might mean that they will finally get right with God - and you. Anyone who has struggled with sin can tell you that one sin leads to another which leads to another... and the more sin the harder it is to get it all right and taken care of. We should rejoice when we see them doing the right thing! That shows a tenderness towards God and perhaps a leading to restitution
  • Beareth All Things - Carry the other person's burdens
  • Believeth All Things - When they tell you that they are sorry... believe them
  • Hopeth All Things - An old saying is "while there is life, there is hope". It is ok to hope for a restoration!
  • Endureth All Things - No matter what happens... you will always still love this person. Period. 
So, what are you going to do with this? Maybe, you aren't necessarily in the wrong. But when you do not respond in love, you are, in fact, sinning. Love is a command, not an option. So....Maybe you need to make things right. Maybe you need to admit to other person that you have sinned by not loving them in a Biblical manner. 

Please do not merely change your actions without making a verbal acknowledgment of your wrong! This is very important. When you do not admit your wrong, the other person will not see their need to admit their wrong. You are also dancing on the edge of pride, since you do not see the need to "go to thy brother" (Matthew 5:24) and humble yourself. 

Please do not leave this website without reading two other posts of mine, if you have not already done so: Mirror Image and Soul Piercing. Please note, I am not writing to someone else, I am writing this to YOU.

Because of Him,
Missa

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Offending Gospel

Maybe this isn't a post for my regular readers... but it might be. Or maybe this post will just be one to refer to in future discussions. Definitely more practical than philosophical.

Manners matter.

Well, yeah, that's what my mom always said!

But have you ever really thought about what manners are and what their purpose is? Manners are actions or words used to make everyone around you as comfortable and non-distracted as possible. But does this really make a difference to a Christian?

Yup.

When you are having a conversation with someone, do you notice them doing things you were taught weren't polite? For example, as kids, we were not allowed to have our elbows on the table. Now, when I'm eating with someone, if they put their elbows on the table, it distracts me, even if only momentarily. The same goes for chewing gum in church, using language that is crude (not necessarily swearing, just unpleasant words), and cracking knuckles.

The point is, Satan will use whatever he has to to distract people from the Gospel, even bad manners. When someone displays poor manners, they are saying, even unintentionally, that they are the most important person in the room and they don't care what you think.

I've been told that having an attitude of not caring what people think is a good thing, and it probably is. Nevertheless, we must be aware that some actions completely repulse people. Without them, you are not that much at a loss, but your friends may be greatly benefited by them. You will never offend people by your lack of crudity, but rather attract people by your abundance of consideration.

Let me give another example in a slightly different direction. Recently, I was discussing an issue with a friend of mine concerning a recent news story about a boy not being allowed to wear a shirt with a confederate flag to school. While I agreed with the young man about it being an encroachment on our American liberty, I disagree that we should actually protest it, or intentionally wear that symbol (or any other one, for that matter) to make a statement. A common saying in this time is to "wear your heart on your sleeve". Let everyone know all of your opinions and vehemently defend them at all times.

But who are we proclaiming to the World? Ourselves? ... or Christ?  In 2 Corinthians 4:5, Paul gives himself as a model for how we should act. We're preaching Christ and Him crucified. Verse 11 talks about living Christ in the flesh. We are living like Christians (little Christs) at the expense of who we are.

Now before you decry my statements as too harsh and impossible... consider this; when you purchase a Mac, you are communicating, in a way, that you want to be associated with that brand. You wear a Superman shirt because he's cool. You are continually preaching something - why must it be something of this World and not of Christ? Live your faith - in what you say, do, and display to those around you (1 Timothy 4:12)

Because of Him,
Missa

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Dazed

Green Thunder was robbed. If you don't attend Bob Jones, you likely will not understand, but please just acknowledge that fact as true. Just like the Cardinals were robbed in their Super Bowl attempt a few years ago by a terrible call, so was the Green Thunder team of the 2013 edition of Gold Rush Daze here at the big Bob.

What am I really talking about? When I arrived on campus in January, I was already hearing things about an event coming up in March. A huge campus-wide competition that only occurs once every four years. Of all the semesters I could chose to begin my studies, I had chosen the most epic.

For two and a half months, the anticipation grew with every midnight pep rally and Facebook meme. Then the day came that the students were allowed to decorate the entire campus, and it looked like Christmas had come back to raise it's ugly head (it really did look ugly).

But, unfortunately, events began to take place that tore through the veil of friendly competition. Decorations that had taken hours to make were destroyed. Pranks were played. Some really weren't that bad, but some were pretty destructive.

And the fun stopped.

The competition continued, but the few who had gone too far made the rest of us just wish for March 12th to be over.

One day. That's all. All the planning. All the money. All the late hours decorating. All for one day. All for the "rush" of Gold Rush Daze. I enjoyed the event as much as everyone, but at the end of the day, it really just felt empty. I was hoarse, sunburned, and very tired. I never wanted to see the colors green or red again.

A whole college campus consumed with the temporary.

But, don't we all struggle in that way? Some people call it the rat race, the business of life, or just life. We are consumed with the here and now.

And I don't just mean today.

In the big picture, we have eternity to look forward to as Christians. James 4:14 shows, in a way, how God views our life: a vapor.

A vapor. A tiny puff of water that disappears as soon as it has appeared. That's all that our life is. It's nothing!

And yet it is still something. We are given the number of our days, and no more, to be used to serve God for His glory. While we are here on this earth, ours eyes should be looking for "that blessed hope" and "glorious appearing of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ" (Titus 2:13). The world wants us to see life in the view that today is all that matters; get as much of a "rush" as you can from it. Someone once said (I forget who) that for Christians, this world is as close to Hell as we can get... and for the unsaved, it is as close to heaven as they can get. If that is true, then it is no wonder the unsaved are consumed with this world and the pleasures thereof. But why do Christians become enraptured with it... even within the goal of service?

I've noticed a pattern within my own life. When my focus is on Christ and glorifying Him and looking towards His kingdom, my joy and eagerness to serve Christ knows no bounds. I cannot get enough of His Word or spending time with His people. But when my life is consumed with the here and now, I know that I am only serving for self-glorification...and oddly enough, I'm ok with that, though I have lost the true joy that comes from service.

I'm ok with that?! Yeah, well as a selfish person living in a selfish world, its easy to forget my first and only true love and look back and enjoy what I see, then to continue in life walking backwards. But walking backwards is only easy for a short time. It becomes difficult... confusing. A path that was normal and easy a month ago is now a struggle to surmount. I cannot see all of the pitfalls of sin, and thus fall into them much more easily. I begin a downward spiral, obvious only to me and those who know me the best. Still I persist until, at last, I am driven to my knees begging for forgiveness. I thought that I was standing, but I fell. (1 Corinthians 10:12)

Keep your heart and mind turned to God, and do not allow the world to daze you with its charms and entice you away from Him and the true purpose of life - glorifying Him. Make your vapor count. (Thank you Ironwood)

Because of Him,
Missa